Attitude is Everything

Last week’s Friday Lesson offered by Greg Robinson focused on “presence” being perhaps the most important role of the group facilitator. This week’s Friday Lesson continues with this focus on group facilitation. Jen Stanchfield offers an excerpt from her book Tips & Tools: The Art of Experiential Group Facilitation on “attitude”, another fundamental aspect of facilitation.

“Whether you think you can or think you can’t—
you are right.”  Henry Ford

Group participants truly respond—even subconsciously—to a facilitator’s attitudes, demeanor, and expectations.  We often communicate more than we realize with our body language and tone.  A positive attitude is contagious.  If you really believe in the methods and activities you are using with a group, they will most likely buy in and respond to your enthusiasm.  Conversely, if you aren’t comfortable with the material you are presenting, participants can sense that as well.  People respond to your attitudes toward them.  I believe if we expect the best of participants, they will usually perform their best.

We all work with difficult groups and group situations at times.  Beware of focusing too much attention on the negative behaviors that arise.  Remember to acknowledge and believe in the abilities of the learners in your group.  If you are starting to feel there is “no hope for that kid” or a participant is “pushing your buttons,” then it might be time for some self-reflection.  Take a step back and reflect on the positive aspects and achievements that have occurred; recognize the small steps and successes of the individuals and the group.  It could be that it is time to get some support and new perspectives from a colleague, or if possible find a co-facilitator or co-teacher for the group.

During a recent conversation with a group of teachers about the challenges of working with middle school students, I said, “When I work with that 7th grade group, I keep thinking of the comedy film What about Bob? (1991). In this movie the main character (played by Bill Murray) is guided by his psychiatrist (Richard Dreyfus) to repeat the mantra ‘baby steps’ as he gets over his phobias.  I try to recognize each ‘baby step’ the group members are taking.  If I didn’t, I could become very discouraged.”  One of the teachers responded, “Yes, we have to remind ourselves that we are looking for ‘oak kind of growth’ rather than expecting ‘mushroom kind of growth.’”  I have observed that facilitators who regularly work with challenging populations are skilled at acknowledging and celebrating the small successes and adept at noticing the small, positive steps forward a group is making.

All of us have times when we question our effectiveness.  Group facilitation is not easy.  It takes a great deal of energy and commitment, as well as a willingness to take on challenging interpersonal situations.  Facilitators who continue to enjoy their work remain hopeful, keep their perspective of the big picture, and recognize that growth and change arise from conflict and struggle.  Consistently practicing patience, empathy, and the power of positive thinking reaps great rewards.

“There is a soul force in the universe which, if we permit it, will flow through us and produce miraculous results.”
Mahatma Gandhi

“The last human freedom is to choose one’s attitude in any given set of circumstances.”
Viktor Frankl

Reference: Tips & Tools: The Art of Experiential Group Facilitation by Jennifer Stanchfield. 2007. Wood ‘N Barnes Publishing Bethany, Oklahoma.

2 Responses to “Attitude is Everything”

  1. Similar to the leaders influence in a meeting and project; the facilitator when offering experiential activities and discussions is looked at by people for approval and disapproval. This is evident when teams are struggling with an team-building activity.

    If you watch the people they look at you for clues of rightness and wrongness, they can be influenced. Being mindful of your presence body posture and facial expressions is challenging when you are in front of a group of corporate leaders; and the stress of public speaking is weighing on you.

    The solution? have a co-facilitator in the room with you.

  2. JenStanchfield says:

    I agree Michael! Co-facilitation often makes us so much more effective. I have learned so much from co-leading. When I work with another facilitator I am always impressed by the different things we observe or pick up on in a discussion or activity. It can make for a richer experience for everyone.
    Thanks for your comments.

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